I just realized I mentioned the age of 30 in my last two posts. It's like my biological clock is ticking, but not for a baby, for a career.

As the end of my college career once again approaches, I am once again at a crossroads. What am I going to do in my life? Since I returned to school to pursue a degree in English, I have wanted to go into editing. I still would love to do that. The problem is that it is difficult to find the kind of editing positions in Tucson, much less Arizona. But, for the time being, I must stay here for health reasons. Plus, if we ever decide to have kids, I want them to be near their grandparents. Of late, Brandon has been encouraging me to look into a career in law enforcement. The problem with that is, I don't think I want to be a real cop, just a T.V. detective like my favorite character on Law & Order: SVU! Does he really think I could be Olivia Benson? So I said: "Um, I'm approaching 30 soon and have already wasted enough time finally getting the degree I want AND discovering what I want to do." Would I really want to spend time testing for the police academy just to become a traffic cop or event security guard? I think not. Besides, my family already has one law enforcement agent in the family who is in a relatively dangerous position. He's been shot at and deals with crazy people everyday. I don't need my parents worrying about both their children--even if I were just a traffic cop! I'm happy to take any other career suggestions, though, if anyone has ideas!?

Here's the thing. I'm graduating in a month. In order to graduate, I need only complete my 496 Senior Seminar. I also decided to take three other classes "for fun." I recently received the Academic Distinction Award. I've been writing sufficient papers for the nine years I've been in college (off and on). Now, I'm receiving a B in Sherry's class and a C! in Berkhout's class. Sherry tells our class last Thursday: "Some of you are going to have to learn how to write a paper very soon." Now, if I'm one of those students to which he is referring, I'm in big trouble. How am I to learn how to write a paper in the last month of my academic career? And how to I expect to make it in a career which demands the same? What's a girl to do? I mean, I'm almost 30 (in a couple years) and I haven't even begun to embark on a "real" career. And if I cannot even perform to the best of my abilities, how much more schooling will I have to endure to feel competent enough to begin a career? Sometimes ambition sucks...